Monday, 24 April 2017

Una última vez (más)

























este otoño es especial
por la eterna contradicción
que al ver las hojas caer
siento que dentro mío
afloran los primeros atisbos
que me muestran
que voy a estar bien
y así como los árboles
cambian de color
mi mente se despeja y aclara
le digo adiós a la incertidumbre
y le repito a mi descontento:
lo efímero
nunca puede
ser sempiterno
Y YA ME ES OBSCENO IMAGINARTE
porque de tanto hacerlo
detallada y frecuentemente
siento que es un abuso
por más que sea inocente
Y ME DA VERGÜENZA
(porque siento que lo sabés)
me prometo dejar de hacerlo
no sin antes cerrar los ojos
para visualizarte
una última vez (más)

Tuesday, 11 April 2017

---late night (numb) epiphanies---

the voice of reason
without reasons
filled with willingness

whispering
you should take the risk
(but it's too late)

rage
and passion
don't seem so opposite now
(were they ever?)

everything seems
much more difficult
just having words
without your strenght

being numb
is not so bad
you dont feel anything
but desperation
(don't we all?)

sleepless nights
and cold bedsheets
the idiocy of unfairness
(selfishness
of unavoidable setbacks)

purpose
taken away
screaming
below the surface
those words
(i don't know what's wrong with me!)

the restlessness
not finding
the solution
just words

worries
seem to take over
the ambivalence
of feeling
both uneasy
and oblivious!
(who knew?)

big shadows
taking over

dissociation:
starvation
in my head
(yet
so many thoughts)

prose
brings embodiment
but everything
looks the same
everything
seems dead.